I don’t do terry-towelling

The terry-towelling onesie in 'fresh lavender spew I mean blue'.

I don’t do terry-towelling and either will my bundle of joy once he/ she vacates the warmth of my womb.

There are some things which terry-towelling can be appropriately used for – towels, nappies, burp rags, wraps, bibs and wipes – but to wear as clothing, hell no. My motto is if I wouldn’t be caught wearing it then either shall my mini-human.

Especially terry-towelling onesies. They are hideous. I’m sure they are comfortable, practical, affordable, warm etc but it doesn’t hide the fact they look ugly. The higher up in size they go the uglier they get.

The colours are also less than appealing and after one wash they look even cheaper than they did to begin with – yuck. You cannot make these bad boys look attractive – or can you …

I find it hilarious that the makers of these atrocities against fashion try to jazz up the onesie by giving it a fancy looking collar. Bonds like to use the on-trend Peter Pan-style collar with an embroided trim. Unfortunately it doesn’t steer the eye away from the fabric which has already started pilling the moment your hard-earned cash crossed hands with the shop assistant.

They are so generic looking too. I want my mini-human to stand out from the crowd and to be an individual – not follow the masses. By dressing Predator in a terry-towelling onesie I feel I’d be doing he/she an injustice by forcing he/she to a life of conformity.

I think the only way I would ever consider dressing Predator in a terry-towelling onesie is if it was to be used as an undergarment for extra warmth. However living in Australia it doesn’t get that cold so fashion crisis averted. But ‘what about as pyjamas’ I hear you say – hmm maybe but probably not. Would you wear terry-towelling pyjamas? I didn’t think so.

Remember Paris Hilton? She tried to make terry-towelling cool and for a while there Juicy Couture made a pretty sweet fortune flogging its terry-towelling tracksuits to the masses.

If I remember correctly JLo and Kim Kardashian also tried to make terry-towelling happen. As Regina George said “it’s not going to happen”.

Terry-towelling hats were once cool – oh hang on no they weren’t.

According to Wikipedia – which knows EVERYTHING and is a very credible source – terry-towelling or terry-cloth is “a fabric with loops that can absorb large amounts of water”. Oh so that’s why it’s used to make towels!

I don’t plan on taking Predator swimming fully clothed and I hope I would change he/she’s nappy before a onesie was required to absorb the excess moisture. So why on earth would they even make items of clothing in this material? Why oh lords of fashion why?

My family teases me for being fussy and a snob but I like to think that I am giving my baby a head start when it comes to life by putting his/her best well-dressed foot forward. After all as we know – first impressions count.  😉

Is there an item you refuse to dress your baby in?

Maternally yours, Make-terry-towelling-stop